if i died would you start the facebook group?
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize