Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
