I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
