I need help removing her.
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
