kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize