We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
