Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
grandma shit on top of the toilet
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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