Porn is love you can see.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
