he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Randomize
