shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
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