Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize