Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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