Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize