that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
