I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
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