I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize
