Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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