Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Randomize
