Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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