She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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