think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
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