is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
