I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
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There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
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i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"