You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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