we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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