That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
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let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
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Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
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