just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
