Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
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