matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
