In the future we'll all be gay
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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