We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
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