I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Randomize
