his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
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