I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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