Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize