Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Randomize
