I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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