Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
