okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
