we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
