We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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