You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
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