i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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