so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
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