I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
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