That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
