Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
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