Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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