I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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