so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
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