Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
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