I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
